Scary WWF!
by DJ
Summary: A bit of a take on scary movie, with sreams script more, but its meant, MEANT to be funny, even though its rubbish LOL! please r & r! PG13 For Launguage!
1. On The News...

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Scary WWF  
Chapter One: On The News…

I don't own ne of the charecters, vince wwfe do etc. this is slightly a taken off from scary movie except its more concentrating on the cripts of scream, oh wot the heck read it and find out!

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Ring Ring 

Mike: Hello

Voice: Hello

Mike: Hi, who is this

Voice: It's me

Mike: Oh shut up Chris, this ain't funny, what ya want

Voice: I want you to turn round slowly so I can eat your heart out

Mike: Eh? (Turns round) Holy Christ

* 

TV: Hi I'm Laura reporting for NBC to report the Tragedy that is STEPS SPLIT UP! Were all gonna get drunk and have a big party. Anyway steps were massive in the UK, supported Britney here in the US, and had like 1 song in the billboard top 100, BUT WERE HAPPY…

Lita and Jeff sit in corner with their steps collection crying

Lita: I'm gonna kill that bitch MWHAHAHAH

Jeff: MWHAHHAHAH

Matt: Will ya shut it you guys, and listen to some decent music like Creed, Americas number one band. The smash hit album 'Weathered' in all good record stores now! (Turning up the volume)  
  
TV: And in other news, In the north of Carolina the mass murder now dubbed by the police as 'The Invisible One' Has made another attack. The victim this time was 29 year old Mike Matthews who was in his home when it happened. Police Officer Drew Summers said 'This was a particularly bad attack, the invisible one had cut out the victims heart and left it next to Mike with a knife in it'. All those in the Area of Cameron are warned to lock all doors and windows and keep a look out.

Matt: Gee

Jeff: Matt, Matt (Clung on to right leg)

Amy: Save us baby (Clung on to left leg)

Matt: Guys! Were fine, were going of to WWF New York in 2 days

Jeff: 2 Days!

Matt: Do you want me to call and see if we can go tomorrow

Jeff: Would you Matt, for me, I could kiss you

Matt: Well please don't!

Amy: (Standing on chair) Don't worry, Mighty Woodpecker Amy is here to save you (Does stupid dance)

Matt: Amy, sit down

Jeff: Slap her Matt, slap her, just once for me, and slap her real hard, mwhahahahah

*

Voice: Look at them in there, panicking, well we will get them

Voice 2: We sure will, come on…

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Yeah I know its short…and crap….and boring….and un funny! But besiseds that its great :D! Please review I know its rubbish and if I get more than 2 good reviews(as well as fainting), I will consider doing more!

Thanks  
Luv dan x


	2. To Safety?

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Scary WWF  
Chapter Two: To safety?

I don't own any of the characters, Vince wwfe do etc…

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Jeff: Oooooh look at the planes

Amy: There like birds, so so very (wipes a tear away) beautiful

Matt: Stop being freaks, the two of you

Checkout Lady: Could I have your tickets please, Mr…

Matt: Hardy, There you go

C L: Thank you (Flashes eyebrows) You are sexed, I I mean seated on row 4, seat 7, on top, I mean first class

Jeff: I think she likes us

Matt: Yeah, sure Jeff

Amy: Girls dig us Matt

Jeff: Hey that's my line

Amy: Blame the scriptwriters, or are you gonna take on… Mighty Woodpecker Amy? (Strikes dramtic pose)

Matt: Quit making a seen

C L: Thank you for flying with me, I mean Monarch Airlines (Licks Lips)

Matt: BYE!

*

Ring Ring

Vince: Vince McMahon

Voice: Hello

Vince: Who the hell are you

Voice: Well that would ruin the game, but a bit of advice, don't put the phone down

Vince: What game

Voice: Where are you

Vince: At work, where are you

Voice: At your work

Vince: If this is some kinda joke some one isn't gonna be getting paid

Voice: I Don't think you're gonna be paying anyone

Vince: Why, Oh no no, Shit, AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

*

Cabin Crew Lady: Hi, I'm Amanda I will be looking after you on this flight to New York

Jeff: Do we get peanuts dude?

Amanda: Yes (Looks scared)

Matt: Ignore him he's just a tad, well completly mad

Amy: Amanda, STOP LOOKIN AT MY BOYFRIEND

Amanda: Huh?

Amy: MIGHTY WOODPECKER AMY! (Starts doing action like woodpecker into Amanda's chest)

Matt: I really worry about that girl's sexuality

Jeff: Girls dig her man

Big bang is heard from the front of the plane and a nose comes flying out

Amy: Well I sorted her out

Jeff: Ooooh Matt, I got a free nose in my coke

Matt: Oh god!

Jeff: Do you think were be safe in New York Matt

Amy: They always have elephants to hide in

Matt: Amy is that an ear stuck to your top

Amy: Oh yeah, so it is

Matt: What the hell did you do in there

Amy: That would be telling!

Jeff: Matt there's a zombie outside my window

Matt: Yeah Jeff

Jeff: No look it's the fit Amanda woman, minus a few body parts

Matt: AMY!

Jeff: Scooby doo!

Lita: Huh

Matt: What?

Jeff: SHAG ME BABY, YEAH!

Amy: Ahem, Matt we left those nasty people behind haven't we, were be safe in New York wont we?

Matt: Sure we will Amy, sure we will…

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Ok hopefully it will get better (there's hope yet, possibly!) when we get into the story, is Vince really dead or did he just see something scary like Stephanie! All will be reviled!


	3. Forming A Team

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Scary WWF  
Chapter Three: Forming A Team

I don't own any of the characters, Vince wwfe do etc…

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Police Officer: Sorry sir you can't come in here

Matt: Why?

P O: There's been an attack on one Mr…McMahon

Matt: Vince? What happened?

P O: It would seem its another attack by The Invisible One

Matt: Oh, thanks sir

Jeff: Whets going on Matt

Matt: There's just been an accident Jeff that's all

Amy: Do you think that mighty wo…

Matt: No Amy, I don't think so

Jeff: It's not that invisible guy again is it?

Matt: Yeah, and its something to do with Vince

Amy: How did he get over here (leaps about looking under burger boxes on floor)

Matt: AMY! He won't be under them

Amy: I Knew, I'm hungry

Jeff: Me to Matty

Matt: Did you just call me Matty

Jeff: I dint say that

Amy: Hey that's my line!

Jeff: Go tell someone that care's woman! I kick butt with insults!

Matt: You really don't!

Laura (TV Presenter): Hello, I'm Laura Wetndwild reporting for NBC live from outside the WWF New York HQ, where Vince McMahon has just been attacked by 'The Invisible One'. Police have not yet released a statement but early reports say that Mr McMahon is in a critical state in hospital. Expect a full statement by the police and WWF in the next hour, This has been Laura…

Amy: It's the bitch that dissed Steps! (Spinning around in a circle) MIGHTY WOODPECKER ON THE RAMPAGE!

Laura: …Wetndwild (Amy runs right into her) reporting for NBC, U bitch, can I say bitch on TV, no oh, Back to the studio

Amy: Why you diss Steps, WHY!

Laura: Cos…I Love you

Amy: Well come closer

Laura: Ok (Walks straight past Amy to Matt) Hi Mr… hehe HARDY!

Matt: Erm…Hi! I don't think this is the best time, We got try work out what's going on, right Jeff

Jeff: Phwoar! Girls dig us Matt

Matt: JEFF! And anyway girls dig me

Amy: Why wont girls dig me, I get left with you (Runs off crying)

Laura: Well, I'm always up for a good story, so maybe I could help you

Matt: I dunno

Laura: Please (Starting to lick Matt's neck)

Matt: SURE!

*

Inside Lauras hotel room… 

Matt: Jeff put Laura's lipstick down

Amy: It looks like a dildo!

Jeff: Hehe lets play with it

Amy: Oooooh yeah

Matt: AMY!

Amy: Sorry Matty poo!

Matt: Ok then

Amy: You know you said you would do anything for me Matt

Matt: Yeah…

Amy: Will you have a sex change

Laura and Jeff Gasp

Matt: Erm…Ill have to think about that one!

Laura: So then, Matt hehe, What's the plan

Matt: Well, were gonna have to speak to everyone in the WWF first and try not let the police find out

Jeff: Ill keep my ears open and eyes closed

Amy: We could play hide and seek!

Laura: So are we a team then, hehe (putting hand on Matt's Leg)

Matt: Yeah, were gonna sort this out

Jeff: FOUND YOU!

Matt: Oh god, kill me now!

Ring Ring

Jeff: Hiyerrrrrrrrrr

Voice: Hello

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Hmmm…. Gettin into the story now! A bit of the cliffhanger! So will Vince live on or not, will Laura rape Matt, is her surname really.. .Wetndwild! Find out soon!


	4. Making Contact

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Scary WWF  
Chapter Four: Making contact

I don't own any of the characters, Vince wwfe do etc…

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Laura: Hey that's my cell phone

Jeff: Oooooh, can I have it

Laura: NO!

Jeff: Bah humbug!

Laura: (Edges away) Erm…Hello

Voice: Hi it's me, Ropo

Laura: Ropo?

Ropo: Yes, your fucking camera man don't you remember anything

Laura: Oh! Hehe, I'm sorry, I got busy hehe (Winking at Matt)

Ropo: Riiiiiight, well the boss said if we don't have a report in ten then you're fired

Laura: Hehe, your funny, hehe

Ropo: Just get you ass down here now girl

Laura: Actually its queen leaf hardy…

Phones buzzing

Laura: He hung up, BIATCH!

*

Laura: Hello, this is Laura hehe Wetnwild reporting about hehe the filamonshaldo… (Whispers) What am I reporting about?

Ropo: Fuckin hell, shit I can't say that, shit I did it again, arghh the murder!

Laura: You said a naughty word hehe! Oh yeah, the murder of some guy that isn't dead, Anyway back to the hehe I mean hehe studio!

Ropo: Do you think there gonna sack you?

Laura: ME! I'm beautiful daharlin hehe!

Ropo: But you never say anything, except hehe

Laura: Less is hehe I mean more daharlin! And I say daharlin daharlin

Amy: Sorry to interrupt this mad show but will you fuck me

Ropo: Ok

Amy: No not you

Laura: ARGHHHHHHH HEHE!

Amy: Well Matt wont have a sex change

Jeff: OOOOH! Can you Matt?

Matt: Erm… Yes nobody, I'm coming!

Jeff: HEY! NOBODYS MY FRIEND!

Matt: We know Jeff, We know

Big milk carton wonder up giving out samples of K-Milk

Milk Carton: Hello! Buy new K-Milk to brighten up your day

Jeff: Ooooooooh milk, better than sex, i've never had sex (starts to cry)

Milk Carton: MY MILK!

Matt: Is that Kurt?

Milk Carton takes off top half

Kurt: Yes, how you know

Laura: It kinda says hehe…Kurt on your top dumbass

Amy: You called my baby

Laura: Hehe huh?

Amy: You want your Amy?

Matt: AMY!

Laura: MATHEHET

Jeff: KURT!

Kurt: JEFF!

Jeff: Lets swim naked in a bath of milk

Matt: Kill me now

Mysterious Girl: OK! (Appearing out of no where) MWHAHAHAH HAVE YOU SEEN HANIBAL!

Matt: Yeah, why?

Mysterious Girl: YOUR ABOUT TO BE IN IT, OH SORRY ILL HAVE TO KILL YOU SOME OTHER TIME MUMMYS CALLING (Disappears)

Matt: What the fuck is up with this place!

Laura: We can hehe fuck!

Amy: OK!

Laura: OH MY GOD HEHE!

Ring Ring

Laura: Hehello

Voice: Your teams gonna try find me is it then?

Laura: Yeah were gonna track your hehe down if you're that killer guy

Voice: DON'T SAY HEHE WOMAN!

Laura: Ok, where are you? How you know I saying hehe

Voice: Cos' your on the phone to me

Laura: Oh hehe yeah

Voice: Anyway dick head, if you wanna find me, come alone at twelve to night to where you are now, ALONE!

Laura: Hehe, ok. Are we gonna play sex games? 

Phones silent

Laura: WHY DO PEOPLE ALWAYS HANG UP ON ME!

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Not really getting into the plot yet, but next chapter will have more dying and were start to track em down, get clues and will Laura be the new Sherlock?


End file.
